Psycho Bird

Last week I started hearing an occasional thud coming from my boss's office. I thought it a little odd but dismissed it as some random thing that didn't matter. Later I found out that a robin seems to have taken a liking to my boss. It'll stand on the ground just below his window, fly up, peck once at the window, and drop back down to the ground. It'll do this several times in a row.

So this week my boss drew a rough sketch of a cat and taped it to the window to see what effect this might have. Unfortunately the bird is not frightened by pieces of paper. At lunch today, when I sat in the back room near the popular window, I heard it. Thud. Silence... Thud. Silence...

The bird's at it again, I thought. And yes it was. I must have heard close to two dozen thuds in just a few minutes. I was fine with the first few, but after a while I just started laughing and couldn't stop. Well, I could for a moment, but then I'd start shaking again and tears would well up in my eyes. Once I managed to take a bite of my tasty lunch, I could focus on chewing and not be fazed by any psycho birds.

So what is this bird's problem? One theory, which is not mine, is that the bird was out drinking at a bar because it's girlfriend broke up with it. Another theory, which is mine, is that it was sent on a mission to give my boss an important message. But alas! The MapQuest directions didn't explain that the window would be closed!

Night Out

My family and I sat down last night to watch The Office, as we normally do when it's a new episode. This one, entitled "Night Out," did not have the usual office setting. These episodes tend to be sub par.

Dad still thought it was a good episode, but he kept expressing his sadness that Ryan now seems to have a problem with drugs. I tried to tell him that Ryan's just a character; he doesn't really exist. But my dad is still disappointed with one of his favorites.

I guess I shouldn't make fun. I do get caught up in the Jim/Pam plot. I mean, it's Jim and Pam! Come on!

Train Wreck

I was part of a train wreck last night that was a class presentation. When I got home, my parents immediately asked me, "So how did it go?"

I said, "Not well."

They asked, "Which part?"

I replied, "All of it."

And then Dad tried saying nice things when all I wanted to do was let it go. But it's just about all my mind falls on today...

Evening Glow

It's past 8 p.m. and there's still some light outside! (If you wait long enough, you might get what you want.)

Ummm...

I am indecisive. It is hard for me to make up my mind on many things much of the time. I'll lean one way, then another, and if a third or a fourth option arises, I'm just plain paralyzed.

But at least I'm gaining some company. There's someone I know who told me last month that she was leaning in direction A. Last week I asked her for an update, and she informed me of direction B, only a few days later to switch back to direction A. And this is someone who I thought was good at deciding and sticking!

Actually, if you look at it another way, I am decisive. I can decide on something. The problem is that it's hard to stick to that decision.

It reminds me of the Seinfeld episode in which Jerry thinks he had made a reservation at a car rental business only to find out they took the reservation but didn't hold it (emphasizing the holding being the most important part of the reservation).

But you know what I realized a few days ago? It's okay if I'm confused. I don't need to rush into a new decision. I can just be thankful for what I've got right now.

...or can I?

Ctrl Z

A few days ago I erased some penciled notes only to wish I hadn't the second I finished. My immediate thought was to hit "Ctrl" "Z." But wait! I can only do that on the computer! Rrggh! I think I need to add some functions to my current list of capabilities. Any knowledgeable surgeon-programmers out there?

I---t

I feel like an idiot. An idiot who's in a decent mood, but an idiot just the same.

Pass the Pink Stuff!

Roller coasters, swirly rides, and the like have never been my thing. My stomach and sense of balance are less than accepting of these strange experiences. Even so, I thought I could handle swinging at Pike Lake the other evening. Nope. I know I used to like swinging as a child, but apparently I'm getting too sensitive for even this simple activity. For hours afterward my stomach was nauseated and my head felt funny. Just another proof that I'm weird.

Deadbolt Blues

Well, it's happened. My parents changed the locks on me. They got a new deadbolt since the old one was being testy. But my mom was nice enough to tell me to just ring the doorbell when I get home, instead of trying my key for who knows how long before I realize it doesn't work.

This brings to mind some childhood memories of getting locked out of the house. I'd walk home from elementary school but couldn't get inside. I don't remember if it was because I forgot my key (a likely possibility considering who we're talking about), or because it was the middle of the winter and the lock refused to take my key. I think the latter was the case at least a few times, because I remember shivering in the cold, waiting for my mom to get home.

Later on in my childhood, when it was both my brother and me, we got a little wiser and would crawl in through a window. With age comes wisdom... hopefully.

Thirty Bananas

This is what Dad bought last night. Mom and I looked at each other and asked him if he was going to eat them all. He said that we could have some, but, yes, he was planning on eating them.

Apparently someone told my dad that bananas are good for you, so he's eating bananas. Yep. Bananas.

Sickness Is All in the Mind

This is what my dad claims. Brainpower, he says, is what keeps him from getting sick. Of course, he can have a fever and aches, throw up, and maybe even succumb to a rare disease that causes him to lose a limb without it being sickness.

Sickness, according to my dad, is missing work. And since my dad hasn't missed work for bodily happenings in... well, ever, he thinks he can say that he's immune to it.

And so on those occasions when my dad is practically coughing up a lung, I smile and make a nice little comment about how he must have lost his brainpower. He counters with, "I'm not sick," and I finish with, "Mmmhmmm."